The Mind That Won’t Stay Silent

Let us embark on a journey toward ourselves. Let’s name this adventure “The Mind That Won’t Stay Silent.”

Why?

Because silencing our tongue and not expressing what’s in our hearts may be easy for many of us, but the real challenge lies in quieting our inner world and achieving tranquility there. Unfortunately, we often fail at this. The murmur within us never stops questioning.

• What do I need to do today?
• Why did I say that yesterday?
• What if I’m late for myself again?
• Why isn’t it working?

This cycle has neither a boundary nor an end. Sometimes, a memory from the past, sometimes a possibility yet to come cries out in our minds. And as a result, a weariness that drains us before the day even begins settles onto our shoulders.

And from there, it trickles down onto the shoulders of those around us.

So first, we lose ourselves within. Then our children become directionless in time.

And Then What Happens?

While we manage to physically be everywhere and do everything, we remain incomplete emotionally—and worse, we leave others incomplete too.

The emotions we suppress throughout the day begin to speak within us.

Even if disappointments don’t find words, they don’t fall silent in the mind, and they bring with them guilt and anxiety…

Perhaps a childhood memory, or a never-understood loneliness.

That’s how the restless mind reveals itself in long nights.

Thoughts arise as a defense against the emotions we try to avoid during the day, leaving us vulnerable. And without even realizing it, we embrace them. Because thinking feels easier than acting on what we feel.

And right at this point, another title embraces us:

Mental Busyness Is an Emotional Defense

Our mind’s constant activity is actually an emotional alarm system. It’s the most protected route away from the things we don’t want to face. So much so, we believe we can control everything through rational thought. Yet the deeper we think, the more anxious we become. Mental clutter cannot mask the loneliness of the heart or the turmoil of the soul.

That’s why no matter how much we smile or fulfill our daily responsibilities, the sense of emptiness within inevitably reveals itself.

That void we feel in our chest is the voice of our unmet needs we have ignored.

And Now Another Heading…

“As We Approach Ourselves, Silence Begins”

The mind seeks clarity. And this clarity is not achieved through suppression, but by listening to its cries.

When we ignore ourselves, we become unreachable.
Therefore, instead of complaining and fleeing from the thoughts swirling in our minds, what we must do is take action to resolve the mental chaos that reflects unresolved issues.

What loops in the mind gives us information about our problems. Accepting and striving to resolve them is the path to a healthier mindset.

So let’s open one more heading as an example—where does the mind challenge us the most?

When the Mind Overflows: Relationships and Parenting

When our minds are this overwhelmed, it becomes harder to build healthy relationships in the outside world.
Mental clutter clouds empathy. We cannot stay present. We fail to fully hear others. We get caught up in details and may struggle to express love. When there’s a war inside our minds, it’s hard to build peace outside. This becomes especially visible in our relationships—and most clearly, in parenting.

At this point, we must recognize that mental burden is not just an individual issue but one that spreads into the family system. Because when we become parents, we don’t just raise children—we confront our inner world too. And the intensity of that confrontation often reveals itself through our children’s behavior.

To Be a Parent Is to Meet Yourself

Parenting isn’t just guiding a child—it’s also facing our own inner parts. Raising a child brings out the parts of us that haven’t yet matured. Our impatience, our expectations, our fears… all can be triggered by a child’s behavior. That’s why parenting is, in a way, getting to know yourself.

If the Child Is Not Calm, Look Who Isn’t

When we see anxiety, anger, or behavioral issues in our children, we often absorb the emotion or try to correct it right away.
But really, who isn’t calm at home?
Who is tense, exhausted, filled with suppressed feelings?
Children feed on emotion and absorb even the subtlest ones. They mirror the emotional atmosphere of their environment. Could their unrest be a sign that the burden they carry isn’t theirs?

Of course, these problems are not unsolvable.
Instead of silencing or changing the child, when we begin to give voice to the family as a whole, the mind starts to recognize its overload. And slowly, it begins to rebuild its inner silence…

A clear mirror is the strongest foundation for a healthy parent-child relationship.

Listen to Your Own Voice First

Mental busyness is not just a personal issue. Connecting with our emotions, staying present, and being nourished by stillness is essential not only for our own well-being but also for our children’s psychological development.

Let us not forget:
Children are the outward reflection of our inner world. They are our mirrors.
The shortest path to understanding them is first to hear ourselves.

So please—listen to your own voice first.

Psk. Zeynep SAKOĞLU